I forgot what's going down this Saturday. Face Plant. Ugh.

You poor men. I genuinely have empathy for you. Its like those TWO effing days a year you HAVE TO PROVE YOUR LOVE or you're a narcissist. Always a narcissist.

Meaning : if you don't blow a fortune on the female this Saturday or on your anniversary...you're dead to her.

WOMEN! IN THE REAL WORLD! WAKE UP!

So like I was saying...i know you have a lot of pressure coming up for Sat. Just know.....you might not even get action at the end of V day. Listen I'm not being a buzz kill but I am playing Devils Advocate here

I think you'd be far better off deducting some money from the fortune you're gonna waste on Saturday...and SEE ME TODAY

With this strategy I am proposing you will see results such as:

You'll get TOP SHELF GUARANTEED ADULT PLAY TIME FROM ME IN ADVANCE OF WHAT MIGHT NOT HAPPEN ON SAT.

You'll get a WORLD CLASS FANTASY WORSHIP SESSION from a HOT AS ALL HELL woman in advance of what isn't necessarily a reality for this coming Saturday...AS IN MY BODY = PAMELA ANDERSON IN BAYWATCH BUT 1000 TIMES BETTER MIMUS THE PLASTIC CHEST...do you have that coming on Saturday ? If you do, she comes with Drama. I'm just saying.

I'm A PERFECT TEN , IM BEAUTIFUL, IM SO COST EFFECTIVE RELATIVELY SPEAKING IM SHOCKED YOU DON'T SEE ME DAILY ...

but then again I advocate for seeing me no more than twice monthly.

Addiction is real. JA or Julia Anonymous MEETINGS ( a 12 step recovery program for Julia addicted individuals) have been rather full lately and we wanna get those numbers down .

Back to V DAY - IT SUCKS!

Rather come see me now and at least when you get to Saturday you'll have the smug feeling of " well when this horse and pony show is over i can go back to Julia next week and NOT buy the V Day chick more nails at the salon".
Or... " Julia doesn't even have nails. She's perfect enough already "

You'll be having those kinds of thoughts .

You're technically not a male if you don't.

Love,
Julia Ward!