If someone has experience with this please do let me know
A lot of people think non-ejaculatory orgasms are about forcing yourself not to finish, but it's more about learning control over arousal levels and breathing.
A few basics that usually help:
1. Breathing -- slow, deep breathing helps move the sensation through the body instead of letting it build too quickly in one place.
2. Relaxation instead of tension -- when people get close to ejaculation they tend to tense the pelvic muscles. Learning to stay relaxed while highly aroused is key.
3. Edging practice -- bring yourself close to the point of no return and then back off repeatedly. Over time you start recognizing the different stages of arousal and gain more control.
4. Pelvic floor awareness -- exercises like Kegels (and reverse Kegels) help you understand and control those muscles better.
5. Slowing down -- the moment you feel things escalating too quickly, pause, breathe, and let the sensation spread rather than pushing forward.
It usually takes patience and a lot of experimentation, so don't stress if it's inconsistent at first. Most people who get good at it treat it like a long-term practice rather than a quick trick.
Edited: 2026-03-11 10:08:40
On 2026-03-11 09:40:20 sj. said:
Hi looking for some help learning how to have non ejaculatory orgasms. Seems like it's always a hit or miss, think I'm missing something just need help getting my technique down.
If someone has experience with this please do let me know
If you can find a lady (Madame Vespera seems to know) that can teach you how to edge yourself, then you can do the DIY. The more you do it, the longer you will last and then eventually it just happens
3. Edging practice -- bring yourself close to the point of no return and then back off repeatedly. Over time you start recognizing the different stages of arousal and gain more control. These steps you can do on your own though...
4. Pelvic floor awareness -- exercises like Kegels (and reverse Kegels) help you understand and control those muscles better.
5. Slowing down -- the moment you feel things escalating too quickly, pause, breathe, and let the sensation spread rather than pushing forward.
On 2026-03-11 09:44:41 Madame Vespera said:
It's actually a skill that takes practice rather than something that just "happens."
A lot of people think non-ejaculatory orgasms are about forcing yourself not to finish, but it's more about learning control over arousal levels and breathing.
A few basics that usually help:
1. Breathing -- slow, deep breathing helps move the sensation through the body instead of letting it build too quickly in one place.
2. Relaxation instead of tension -- when people get close to ejaculation they tend to tense the pelvic muscles. Learning to stay relaxed while highly aroused is key.
3. Edging practice -- bring yourself close to the point of no return and then back off repeatedly. Over time you start recognizing the different stages of arousal and gain more control.
4. Pelvic floor awareness -- exercises like Kegels (and reverse Kegels) help you understand and control those muscles better.
5. Slowing down -- the moment you feel things escalating too quickly, pause, breathe, and let the sensation spread rather than pushing forward.
It usually takes patience and a lot of experimentation, so don't stress if it's inconsistent at first. Most people who get good at it treat it like a long-term practice rather than a quick trick.
The only thing she forgot to mention is that its best practiced with an assistant.
This thread has a few SPs I'd recommend, based on my own experience with them. Vespera appears to be very knowledgeable, so probably also a good option.
www.esa.co.za/forum/thread.php
Not on the list is Jessica Foxxx. Still struggling to find the words to describe the experience.
An old Indian lady once said to me in a discussion about religion: 'Heaven is like having an orgasm", and I responded "You have my attention"; she continued, "imagine an orgasm, the pleasure and the intensity at it's peak, and imagine it never stops'.
Oh, I can add one more thing to Vespera's guidance. An orgasm is not only felt in the pelvic area, but through your whole body. When you allow it to spread, it last longer, and can be way more intense. Its not about suppression, but surrender, allowing it to consume you. Initial you need to practice a bit of control, but I wouldn't really call it control, more like directing the flow. And if you get it right, an ejaculation almost becomes impossible and you can just surrender allowing the waves of pleasure to ripple through you. It's like the code for an ejaculation gets deleted and your body just remains in an orgasm. If you want to ejaculate, you actually need to take control again and try to rewrite the script. But I find it best just to continue until your body literally cant handle it anymore. No need to spill semen.
Wishing you well on your journey.
Edited: 2026-03-11 20:47:31
Thank-you for the mention J_J
Unrushed.
Engaged.
Surrendered.
Timed and...edged.
RB.
I'm jealous!
On 2026-03-11 19:10:56 J_J said:
On 2026-03-11 09:44:41 Madame Vespera said: It's actually a skill that takes practice rather than something that just "happens."
A lot of people think non-ejaculatory orgasms are about forcing yourself not to finish, but it's more about learning control over arousal levels and breathing.
A few basics that usually help:
1. Breathing -- slow, deep breathing helps move the sensation through the body instead of letting it build too quickly in one place.
2. Relaxation instead of tension -- when people get close to ejaculation they tend to tense the pelvic muscles. Learning to stay relaxed while highly aroused is key.
3. Edging practice -- bring yourself close to the point of no return and then back off repeatedly. Over time you start recognizing the different stages of arousal and gain more control.
4. Pelvic floor awareness -- exercises like Kegels (and reverse Kegels) help you understand and control those muscles better.
5. Slowing down -- the moment you feel things escalating too quickly, pause, breathe, and let the sensation spread rather than pushing forward.
It usually takes patience and a lot of experimentation, so don't stress if it's inconsistent at first. Most people who get good at it treat it like a long-term practice rather than a quick trick.
The only thing she forgot to mention is that its best practiced with an assistant.
This thread has a few SPs I'd recommend, based on my own experience with them. Vespera appears to be very knowledgeable, so probably also a good option.
www.esa.co.za/forum/thread.php
Not on the list is Jessica Foxxx. Still struggling to find the words to describe the experience.
An old Indian lady once said to me in a discussion about religion: 'Heaven is like having an orgasm", and I responded "You have my attention"; she continued, "imagine an orgasm, the pleasure and the intensity at it's peak, and imagine it never stops'.
Oh, I can add one more thing to Vespera's guidance. An orgasm is not only felt in the pelvic area, but through your whole body. When you allow it to spread, it last longer, and can be way more intense. Its not about suppression, but surrender, allowing it to consume you. Initial you need to practice a bit of control, but I wouldn't really call it control, more like directing the flow. And if you get it right, an ejaculation almost becomes impossible and you can just surrender allowing the waves of pleasure to ripple through you. It's like the code for an ejaculation gets deleted and your body just remains in an orgasm. If you want to ejaculate, you actually need to take control again and try to rewrite the script. But I find it best just to continue until your body literally cant handle it anymore. No need to spill semen.
Wishing you well on your journey.
Oh boy oh boy what an amazing session it was......
Every inch of your body in my full control, made every part quiver..... Cant wait for the next visit.
Xxx Jessica Foxxx
Reply
Legend
Hover mouse over icons for description
