What made you choose her/him???

To married people,What made you to marry him or her??how did you know he/she was your soul mate??

Hmmmmm, u found someone special miss Barbie?

Difficult one.
34y ago we were in the same space and mindset. Same views on most things. My risk apetite intrigued her cautious side and her protective side made me feel special.
Now my risks (not talking sexual) cause tention and her protection feels like smother. Yet i find myself being super protecrive of those i care for. (Aka, i picked up thebhabit myself)

I have moved way left in politics and church and general outlook.
Over simplified, in many ways, i became my father and she became her mother ...

So, were we right?? At the time is was a natural fit and we did most things together, so it was almost inevitable.

Now we raised the most amazing kids and while they are out of coup by now, that is a big thing! She stood by me through some tough times.
We have developed a different kind of love and respect although the click has gone somewhat. So i dont lie if i say i love her dearly.

So was the "feeling" of the time accurate? For the time yes and in a weird way still although our rhythm is somewhat off beat.


sorry for the long answer, but just to say it felt right and came almost naturally, need to be c ontextualised.
Hope it helps.

My first marriage didn't work out as planned, my ex tried to change me into something I wasn't, when she finally realised I am not going to change, we started to grow apart, she met someone else, we got seperated and I divorced her. We grew, evolved differently.

Myself and my current life partner aren't officially married (yet)... Been together since 2013.

We became best friends, and she accepted me unconditionally (regardless of my gender etc). She stood firmly by me with my transition from the beginning and still does. She supports me in everything (good) I do.
We encourage eachother to become the best versions of eachother, we have evolved together. We are both Polyamorous and have had a few other lovers within our relationship, a poly family.
There is open honest communication between us, trust and a deep connection.
Sometimes we do have disagreements etc, we are two different people after all.
We are both in the adult industry. Our relationship and life does have hardships here and there, filled with great memories and experiences, our life itself is an adventure in every way.

I am extremely blessed and happy.
If I want to explore sexually, she allows me to, and vise versa, sex is just a bonus in any relationship. Its that deep emotional and mental connection that matters, where you can confide in your lover without any judgement, where they respond, instead of react.
There are 5 main QUALITIES I always seek in my lovers, and she has them all.
We are soulmates, without her I don't know what I would do.

We see ourselves as evolved, self aware spiritual beings, here to live life to its fullest and to help others grow into better versions of themselves.

Waking up every morning next to her is a blessing, I wish the world could see her through my eyes.

I know I am not supposed to be on this thread.

I never married. I never will. I do not believe in the concept of "soul mates".

I have been in 3 long term relationships. They all failed. I never went into a relationship thinking that it is a temporary thing. But these relationships just never got to a point where I was gonna go all the way.

Perhaps I am selfish. Perhaps it is narcissism. I just cannot get to a point where I am willing to share myself with another person. I am too messed up inside. I feel too bad to expose another person to the darkness within me. And if you cannot share EVERYTHING, then it is unfair to you and the other person.

I prefer to be alone. I prefer to live my life on my own terms. I am too selfish to compromise. I grew up under very bad conditions. Life was hell. When I finished school and got out in the world I tasted freedom for the first time. For the first time I could make my own choices. For the first time I could live, follow my own dreams. That freedom was so precious that I didn't want to exchange one prison (my childhood) for another (a marriage).

Reverse gear failed and never been sorry about it.

Blades, I'm not going to quote your entire post, but did you try therapy? I think you and I may be wrestling the similar demons.

On 2020-07-13 00:01:51 Miss Barbie Doll said:
What made you choose her/him???...

I thought that she had money...she thought that I had money.
28 years later, we discovered that we were both wrong!

On 2020-07-13 11:47:51 semensquirter said:
On 2020-07-13 00:01:51 Miss Barbie Doll said: What made you choose her/him???...

I thought that she had money...she thought that I had money.
28 years later, we discovered that we were both wrong!

Hahaha!

On 2020-07-13 11:32:44 Tomlette said:
Blades, I'm not going to quote your entire post, but did you try therapy? I think you and I may be wrestling the similar demons.

I've been in and out of therapy for almost 20 years...If I count the shitty therapy I got as a child from the state, then it is 30 years...